A Thought...........

"I read and walked for miles at night along the beach, writing bad blank verse and searching endlessly for someone wonderful who would step out of the darkness and change my life. It never crossed my mind that that person could be me."

Anna Quindlen Featured in Something More by Sarah Ban Breathnach (Warner Books)

Today I woke up feeling tired… …It was a another cold rainy day in new jersey.. Hmm don’t feel like going to work, but don’t have much of a choice. Had to finish some work from yesterday, otherwise my boss will be on my back. I am not just tired from work, fed up with so predictable life. Eight hours a day…Monday to Friday at work, then the week end, end up quickly for cleaning and shopping…never really have time for my self ..i don’t mean going for a luxury holiday in a Caribbean islands ( I know it would be nice….) one day…just one day…..without any responsibilities and not feeling guilty about it. Hmm I spent half of my life trying to please every body else, lives up to their expectations….never really figured out that what makes me happy.

If I wake up tomorrow to a one million in my bank account, would that make me happy? That would of course buy me Aston martin, vineyard and a mansion with a lake front which I dreamed of….but is that it? Then again few months time I will get bored with that life too and end up blogging away my sadness. I realized it is not money that can make you satisfied…it is the change you need in life…change which can be done by you. It is the dreams and hopes keep you going in life, people you meet along the way and it is the path you enjoy not the destination.(I don’t wanted to be sounded like my spiritual guru now)

A million dollar question is….what can i do differently to change my life? Hmm…I am going to start with being nice to my husband and then I want to start saving up for a good cause this year. It is something; I always wanted to do when I was growing up in Sri Lanka. Go to a remote village and sponsor a child who does not have privileges for higher education. I mean to open a trust fund and so they can use that money to pay for tuitions fees e.t.c. hmmm back to earth again…. Ooops…It is almost time…..for me to rap up and get ready. Now I have something to work on for today, feeling better already -:) -:)